i want to go

hari ni rasa mcm sedeh ja. tapi kena think positive. mixture of thoughts are playing in my mind. why does Allah created perempuan with this feeling? saya insecure? xjugak.. jealous? lagi la x. karma? maybe kot. tapi what i have done before? I should know that there's someone yang viewing my life from..not too far haha. ish. apa yg dok merepek repek ne. Peeps, im worrying about my future is the most important. my path to achieve my ambition. its not quite smooth lately. Everytime pun mesti ada obstacle. Si polan2 xsempat urus nama la, si polan2 xdapat bagi fund la. mcm xbagi pi pun ada gak T_T

then, few days ago, i received a news yg mcm *&^%%$$#%&^*( saying that i need to retake one of my previous sbjects which i already get exempted before. stupid kan? the reason is, my school now is having problem about accreditation from ministry of education. in order to achieve their University tittle, they must audit every student's profile. disebabkan i was from diploma student, i get exempted quite a lot credit hours actually. and i exceed dan lebih 3 credit hours. wtfish kan? if i retake, it will delay my duration of target going going going there. plus, one of my pihak tajaan said, i have chance to go on september nextyear but must achieve certain pointer. of course i knew this fer a longggg time ago. i want to go not because of anything. its fer make my family especially parents proud of having me. i want to be a very professional architect. i want to T_T

oh. itu baru satu thought. others, i think i should keep them inside la peeps. okay, here i posted some pictures of where should i stand in 1-2yrs lagi T_T but im not so sure. hey. i cant upload them la pulak. internet pun nak stupid lately. ngok.